Street Dog Family

“Turlututuuu!!!” I call on the wind, and he comes running to me, years of abuse not quite forgotten but faded in the foggy , dusky air. Eyes bright as if enjoying a second chance at youth, one ear up and intent on me, the other useless and flopping distractedly; he darts this way and that, following invisible rabbit paths and fox roads. A stronger scents and he forgets I called for him and disappears into the undergrowth.

We walk an uncertain path together, convinced in love but troubled in rules. But we work them out as we go, him learning about social etiquette far removed from the Romanian streets, me picking up on a new language, letting me know what he needs and what he wants.

We never dreamt him and I, ten years or so ago, that we would be together now. We had not even the imagination to invent each other, him surviving and me complacent, him struggling, me unconcerned. But we found each other at last and as is often the case, he knew instantly while I hesitated. He saw me approach for the first time and he knew, he gave me his paw and wagged his tail and he knew, he saw me make ready to leave and he knew … more drastic measures were required. Blocking me on the left, blocking me on the right.. one more hug, paw out…and again and again, until my heart broke. So many tears…and the deal was done.

Together we would fix each other, heal each other. Together we would become better.

With me he has remembered the joy of running in a field and discovered the pleasure of a gentle stroke. He is forgetting the constant presence of fear and hunger. In return, he grounds me with unfailing loyalty and the knowledge, new to me, that there is nothing more important in life than to love another being completely. Slowly, he breaks down my selfish walls, and I find myself worrying a little bit more about the happiness of others, about the serenity of those around me. These new rules, despite frequent setbacks, challenge me but I persevere, unable and unwilling to sail my old course. I love this old dog of mine for these new feelings he has awakened in me. I love this old dog of mine for pushing me around and letting me know that not everything is as it should be in my life, but always underneath it all, he will be there to love me. I love this old dog of mine, because a hug from him makes problems disappear, disappointment fade and tears vanish…nothing in this world will ever really matter as much as a grateful wag of his broken tail.

You maybe an oldie, but to me you’re my baby,

You’ve not got many teeth, a harsh life has ground them down, but to me, your smile is perfect.

I don’t know very much, I am sorry to say, about your life before with me you came to stay

It was too many years without love I suppose, before I was allowed to kiss your gorgeous nose

You have a burn scar there that tells me someone cared; they thought it was a cure, but you would have been scared

The broken toe that healed but is shaped the wrong way, tells me you were alone living life as a stray,

The tail is not quite right and it never lifts up; you hold it to the right, when you run like a pup

You don’t have many teeth, we think you had a beating; but the vet and I, we are only guessing

One ear lies flat on your head, the sound never reaching; I know this much at least, that it was your blessing:

You were so close to death with an infected ear, you had given up hope when an angel appeared

From this pain you were saved to receive loving care, until I found you and now my life you share

I don’t know very much and you can never tell me, but this much I know with absolute certainty:

Your nose, your toe, your tail, your ear, your teeth, your age, your past, your fears,

They don’t matter to me, never have, never will. To me you are perfect, and love you I always will